Emily Kasman, creator of Infinite Health hOMe, stopped by the studio to talk about self care, how important it is and how to make part of your daily routine! Please enjoy this excerpt from our conversation. If you want to listen to or download the show podcast, just follow this link.
Welcome Emily. You are truly a self-care expert. You have your own daily ritual of small, achievable, nourishing techniques that incorporate all seven of her self-care categories. And you’ve created a self-care space where you host retreats, coaching sessions, workshops, and unique classes. And your big message is really all about making self-care part of your daily life.
So much of what we are caught up in in our crazy busy schedules, in our culture, in our society, in our work schedules is that we don’t have enough time for self-care, to take care of ourselves, to fill our own cup up. And a huge reason of why I have pretty much always focused on self-care is because I don’t believe that. I believe that we do have time for self-care. It is a choice, and it has to be a priority, and we have to be ready to take care of ourselves if there are things in our lives that we’re not maybe ready to take care of or to really honor in our lives. We won’t be ready, but when we’re ready to actually take care of ourselves, self-care is a choice, and can be a wonderful priority to fill our own cup.
So many people would agree with you about the importance of self care, they still just can’t seem to make it happen. The day gets going, everybody else’s needs come first. The day gets busy, and then there’s sort of this breathlessness that happens about us and once we get into that state, sometimes it can be hard to just say, “Okay, time for some me time.” How do you help people get through that?
Reclaim Your Day is all about figuring out what those small things you can do within your day can feel like self-care. So for me, waking up without an alarm is self-care to me. So I’m not hitting the snooze button eight times in the morning because I was a classic snoozer for so much of my life. And I recognize that might not be available to every person, but being able to find small things like that throughout your entire day are pieces of self-care that you can integrate into your day. So at the end of the day, you can say, “Oh, I may not have gotten a massage, I may not have had an entire spa day, but I’ve had multiple things throughout the day that actually filled me up.”
So, it doesn’t have to be huge things or necessarily a huge expense?
Another thing that’s really powerful is getting natural light and fresh air, and I love in my mid-mornings to get outside and take a five-minute break. I work from home which is really lovely, and I have a beautiful yard like you mentioned at the beginning. Lots of green, lots of quiet, and so I can get out into my yard whether it’s just my front porch or whether it’s my backyard and just soak up the natural light that’s there. That’s gonna take away the grogginess, that’s going to make me more alert, so then when I do go back to my work, I’m way more fresh, I’m way more on target, and I just get way more stuff done.
Another thing, just moving right on through the day is lunch. Lunch is by far, my favorite part of the day. In our home, my husband is at home as well and we call it “Lunchtime with Emily.” And so it’s a time for us to connect, for us to step away from our computers, to be in the kitchen, to make lunch together, and to just be very present. I never eat at my desk.
I just had a half-day retreat at my Infinite Health hOMe last Friday, and one of the conversations that we had was, “What are elements of your ideal lunch time?” So many people get caught up thinking that they have to get their work done during the middle of the day at their lunch time.
What the self care does is allow you to step away. Just like that fresh air in the middle of the day, in the middle of the morning, you’re gonna find that when you come back, you’re gonna be more productive, you’re gonna be more refreshed, you’ll have more energy to actually get the stuff done that you wanna get done in the afternoon.
The Infinite Health hOMe that you’ve created is absolutely amazing. It feels sacred yet eclectic, all at the same time. You have a little studio, and it’s a very connected feeling space. I feel like every neighborhood should have an infinite home health like. What was your inspiration for starting that?
That’s a great question. There are not many things that I can say this in my life, but I felt like something was working through me to create that. And it happened effortlessly, and the opportunity to move to the house that we’re in really happened effortlessly. And I planned the first event there, probably two weeks after we moved in, and so we were hustling and bustling to paint and get that front room ready within two weeks, and having everything else to move in and whatnot, and it just… The inspiration was creating a really intimate space. There’s only room for 10 mats, yoga mats in this space, and which was kind of my ideal situation, so that I can interact with people very intentionally.
You just came back from a yoga retreat in Iceland, which looked like it was an absolute wonderful time. But you also host various retreats, often in partnership with amazing women who are in yoga or in healing. For example, one that stands out was the self-care sabbatical. I think that was my favorite.
That was the one that was last Friday. I partnered with a local yoga instructor, Susan Heights, and she actually came up with the idea, and I had the space. And the idea was that when moms or parents drop their kids off at school, around 9:00 in the morning, and then they want to have a day to themselves, but they don’t have to plan, we just do it during the timeframe that their children are at school.
There are lots of different ways to can work with me. I’m working on developing a group-coaching program all about reclaiming your day, but you can also work with me one-on-one, where you can come to me with some of the challenges or obstacles that you’re facing when trying to put self-care into your day, and we’ll navigate through those, we’ll try some things out, we’ll discard some things, and we’ll hopefully get you in a really nourishing routine that you feel like you’re thriving in your life.
Tell us about the Infinite Health Method that’s gonna help people put self-care on their calendar.
So I’ve separated the day into six different categories – the Wake Up category, the Mid-morning category, the Lunch category, the Afternoon, Evening, and the Bedtime. And this method that I’m creating goes through how you currently feel. So we check in, how does your body feel? How does your mind feel? What does your environment feel like? What does it look like? What does it entail? So we really look at the current situation. What are some obstacles to self care? What are some things that you’re wanting to overcome? And then for each of those sections, we look at it from the ideal day experience. What are some things that you absolutely want to incorporate in your ideal day?
What would be an example of a goal that somebody would be setting in this kind of scenario?
Let’s say a goal would be, “I want to get at least eight hours of sleep.” That one’s a little bit trickier because it falls in the wake-up section as well as the bedtime section. Together we would figure out what a wind-down routine would be for bedtime. Like step away from your electronics. I know this is a big deal right now, but there’s so much science to back this up that if you’re sitting in bed and you feel like you’re not able to sleep and you start scrolling through social media, that’s hindering your ability to sleep. So step away, put it outside of the bedroom. Let that wind down be very calm, be very graceful, be nourishing.
And use an old school alarm. Don’t be afraid of the alarms that you need to buy from a drugstore or something that you’ve had hidden in your drawer for years. Pull that back out again. And then we would talk about what the ideal morning would look like, what time you need to wake up and setting yourself up for success the night before.
Then we set what we call a bedtime alarm, instead of your wake time alarm. So you’re like, “Okay, I want to be in bed, falling asleep by 10:00 PM.” Set your bedtime alarm by 9:30, do your wind down routine say from 9:00 to 9:30 and then you just really set yourself up. You get all of the things that make you feel rushed in the morning that you’re not able to maybe sip your tea mindfully for five minutes in the morning. Have your tea ready at night. Have the water in the kettle already. Those types of things, very tangible ways to set yourself up for success.
In terms of the self-care routines that you give people, is there a list you have them choose from or are they coming up with their own ideas of what self-care is for them?
It is completely organic for each person. And being able to have conversations with the clients about what works for them. So it’s really what resonates with them, what gives them permission to actually feel like they are taking care of themselves. So it’s totally different for each person.
That is an interesting concept that we need give ourselves permission to take care of ourselves. How do people get over that hurdle?
The whole permission aspect is about the excuse that you are speaking to as well – it’s a choice. So that permission that they’re giving themselves to do something else, rather than self-care is 100% a choice. And they might not think it’s a choice, it may be a security, it may be family, it may be work, it may be all sorts of things, but it’s all a choice.
Then for each of these six times of the day then, you have self-care activity. So you’re waking up, and you were mentioning sipping your tea mindfully for five minutes. Would that be self-care?
Absolutely. Anything that feels really nourishing. Anything that feels like you’re giving back to yourself, your senses are engaged, you’re in the present moment. I really think that anything in that realm is self-care.
I really love this because people often have the best intentions and a lot of willpower and momentum. However, it’s rather aggressively applied in a sense of, “I have to battle myself.” What you’re talking about with mindfully nourishing yourself sounds like it almost would let those defenses down to where change might happen more effortlessly.
That’s the hope. There are still the defenses, but also the excuses that are deeply ingrained in us and the lack of permission that we’ve given ourselves for so many years, those will still come up and that’s why it’s really helpful to have an accountability partner to help you navigate through when those come up, what obstacles are coming up, what challenges are coming up, what excuses continue to rise up. So having that personal and intimate connection with a coach or with a dear friend to help you stay accountable is highly recommended.
Can you talk about hobbies as self-care?
I have always thought that gardening or working outside is self-care. Digging in the dirt, getting dirty. Playing with kids is definitely a form of self-care as long as it’s a choice and not necessarily an obligation. What other hobbies? Bike riding, hiking, backpacking, all of that where you can unplug and get out into nature is deeply healing for me specifically and I know for so many other people out there.
[Listen to the archived show]